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Understanding Marriage
  • To understand marriage, let's look at what transpired from the beginning. 

Jubilees 3-4

3. And on these five days Adam saw all these, male and female, according to every kind that was on the earth, but he was alone and found no helpmeet for him. 4. And Ahayah said unto us: "It is not good that the man should be alone: let us make a helpmeet for him."

  • Ahayah saw that it wasn't good for the man to be alone in his life as every other male had a female for his companion, so he made him a woman as a companion. Not only was man given a woman for companionship in his life, Ahayah also gave men wives to impregnate them and beget children so that they would lack nothing upon earth:

Enoch 15:5

[5] Therefore have I given them wives also that they might impregnate them, and beget

 children by them, that thus nothing might be wanting to them on earth.

  • Ahayah gave men wives, so they may be an aid in companionship and to continue the race of men by being fruitful and multiplying.

Gen 1:28 

 And Alahayim blessed them, and Alahayim said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. 

  • It is a trespass against Alahayim's commands for husband and wife to avoid being fruitful and multiplying by making one's wife barren:

Jasher 2:19-22

19. For in those days the sons of men began to trespass against Alahayim, and to transgress the commandments which he had commanded to Adam, to be fruitful and multiply in the earth. 20. And some of the sons of men caused their wives to drink a draught that would render them barren, in order that they might retain their figures and whereby their beautiful appearance might not fade. 21. And when the sons of men caused some of their wives to drink, Zillah drank with them. 22. And the child-bearing women appeared abominable in the sight of their husbands, as widows, whilst their husbands lived, for to the barren ones only they were attached. 

  • Since the marriage bed is undefiled and whoremongers will be destroyed, {Heb 13:4} a wife is also given to a man as a tower against death by committing fornication:

Sir 26:22  

An harlot shall be accounted as spittle; but a married woman is a tower against death to her husband. 

  • Also, a woman can marry to avoid burning for fornication:

1Co 7:9  

But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

  • Let's see how the marriage process began in the earth:

Jubilees 3:5-7

5. And Ahayah our Alahayim caused a deep sleep to fall upon him, and he slept, and He took for the woman one rib from amongst his ribs, and this rib was the origin of the woman from amongst his ribs, and He built up the flesh in its stead, and built the woman.

6. And He awaked Adam out of his sleep and on awaking he rose on the sixth day, and He brought her to him, and he knew her,

  • When the woman was made, Adam knew her, which is the intercourse required to consummate a marriage:

and said unto her: "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she will be called my wife; because she was taken from her husband."

  • When the woman is given to a man by her father, as the Lord gave Eve to Adam, and the man sleeps with her; they are one:

7. Therefore shall man and wife be one, and therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and cleave unto his wife, and they shall be one flesh

  • The woman was created for the man and came into being of the man:

1Co 11:8  

For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. 
1Co 11:9  

Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man. 

  • yet from that point forward, all men are by the woman in childbirth:

1Co 11:12  

For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of Alahayim. 

1Co 11:11  

Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.

  • So both are one in the Lord not being without one another:

1Co 11:7  

For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of Alahayim: but the woman is the glory of the man. 

  • The man is the image and glory of Alahayim and the woman the man cleaves unto as his own flesh, is his glory, to comprise the image of Alahayim, male and female:

Gen 1:27  

So Alahayim created man in his own image, in the image of Alahayim created he him; male and female created he them.

  • A wife is a man's bone and flesh that he loves as his own body:

Eph 5:28  

So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

  • While the husband is the head of the body which is his wife:

Eph 5:23  

For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

Eph 5:29  

For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

  • Thus far the scriptures show a man's wife is his bones and flesh as his own body and he is her head and the savior of her body because she is his body. When a man takes a wife, she is his nakedness being one flesh with him:

Lev 18:8  

The nakedness of thy father's wife shalt thou not uncover: it is thy father's nakedness. 

  • The man's wife, however many he is appointed by Alahayim, is his nakedness, she being his body that should not be uncovered by another man.

Lev 18:16  

Thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of thy brother's wife: it is thy brother's nakedness.

  • One can confirm that a man's wife is his nakedness even if she is his other wife by evidence of Jacob's other wife, the handmaid Bilhah, was defiled and it was an uncovering of his skirt and shame: 

Gen 30:4  

And she gave him Bilhah her handmaid to wife: and Jacob went in unto her.

Jubilees 33:8, 12

8. And Jacob was exceedingly wroth with Reuben because he had lain with Bilhah, because he had uncovered his father's skirt

12. And again, it is written a second time: "Cursed he be who lieth with the wife of his father, for he hath uncovered his father's shame"; and all the holy ones of Ahayah said "So be it; so be it."

  • Not all men are ordained to be married as some are made eunuchs for the kingdom's sake and abide unmarried:

Mat 19:12  

For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it. 

  • Some men like the Apostles Thomas, John, and Paul became eunuchs for the kingdom's sake remaining unmarried:

1Co 7:7  

For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of Alahayim, one after this manner, and another after that.
1Co 7:8  

I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.
1Co 7:9  

But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

  • The gift of remaining unmarried isn't for every man as some men's gift from the Lord is a silent and loving woman: 

Sir 26:14  

A silent and loving woman is a gift of the Lord; and there is nothing so much worth as a mind well instructed.

  • Also the portion of them that fear the Lord is a good wife:

Sir 26:3  

A good wife is a good portion, which shall be given in the portion of them that fear the Lord.

  • For those who are appointed of the Lord for marriage, wives are appointed for men from the beginning:

Tob 6:17  

And the devil shall smell it, and flee away, and never come again any more: but when thou shalt come to her, rise up both of you, and pray to Alahayim which is merciful, who will have pity on you, and save you: fear not, for she is appointed unto thee from the beginning; and thou shalt preserve her, and she shall go with thee. Moreover I suppose that she shall bear thee children. Now when Tobias had heard these things, he loved her, and his heart was effectually joined to her.

  • If a man has a need to marry, there are protocols for us in the faith: 

1Co 7:8 

I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.

1Co 7:9 

 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

Polycarp to Philippians 5:2

…..It becometh men and women too, when they marry, to unite themselves with the consent of the bishop, that the marriage may be after the Lord and not after concupiscence. Let all things be done to the honour of Alahayim.

  • For further edification on understanding marriage, lawful marriage, and divorce, please visit the following tabs: 

Lawful Marriage:


Interracial Marriage:


Understanding Divorce:


Are Multiple Wives Righteous?:

The Purposes for Marriage

  • Through scripture, we confirm wives are appointed of Alahayim unto men {Tob 6:17} for companionship, {Gen 2:18} as a blessing to be fruitful and multiply, {Enoch 15:5; Gen 1:22} as a tower against death, { Sr 26:22} for the preservation of the woman since the man is the savior of her body as Christ is the savior of the Church {Eph 5:23; Isa 4:1} and for preserving her from burning for fornication. {1Co 7:9} These are upright purposes for marriage. A believing man does not take a wife for lusts sake but for an helper and a stay in uprightness:

Tob 8:6  

Thou madest Adam, and gavest him Eve his wife for an helper and stay: of them came mankind: thou hast said, It is not good that man should be alone; let us make unto him an aid like unto himself.
Tob 8:7  

And now, O Lord, I take not this my sister for lust but uprightly: therefore mercifully ordain that we may become aged together.
Tob 8:8  

And she said with him, Amen.

How to Find a Wife

  • The good man walks in the fear of the Lord laboring in good works, study and business, until Ahayah gives him a wife whom He wills so as to do all things according to the will of Alahayim and avoid suffering from being lead by the spirit of fornication into error:

Testament of Reuben 4:1

Pay no heed, therefore, my children, to the beauty of women, nor set your mind on their affairs; but walk in singleness of heart in the fear of THE LORD, and expend labour on good works, and on study and on your flocks, until THE LORD give you a wife, whom He will, that ye suffer not as I did.


  • Following the simplicity of the testimonies laboring in good works, study and our labors of overcoming the mind and growing closer to Yache while waiting upon a spouse will ensure a good man/ woman who is patient for Ahayah, and prepare a good woman/man for him/her, this will be given to a good man/woman that fears Ahayah and was patient likewise to receive a wife/husband:

Sir 26:3  

A good wife is a good portion, which shall be given in the portion of them that fear the Lord. 

  • In simplicity, the man that walks in singleness of heart in the fear of the Lord will be given a good wife for his portion. Some men, have been given one wife for their portion like Isaac, while others like, Jacob, had multiple wives appointed unto them from Alahayim for their portion. A Believer can be given a wife appointed to him of Alahyim in these different ways according to scripture:

  1. A father gives him his daughter to wife {Tobit 7:7-13}

  2. A father gives him his daughter to wife for a dowry price {Gen 29:18-20}

  3. A wife gives her maid for a wife to her husband. {Gen 16:3; 30:3-4,9}

  4. Being a hired servant, his master gives his maidservant for a wife unto him. {Exo 21:4}

  5. A father sells his daughter to him to be a maidservant betrothing her unto himself {Exo 21:7-11}

  6. A father sells his daughter to a man for his son to wife { Exodus 21:7-11}

  7. A female captive of war whom he has a desire to wife {Duet 21:10-14}

  8. He receives a wife to perform the duty of a husband's brother. {Deut 25:5; Gen 38:8} 

  9. A believing woman who's unbelieving husband departed so she is free to marry a man in the Lord {1 Cor 7:15}

  10. A woman who's husband died so she is free to marry whom she wills in the Lord. {1 Cor 7:39; 1 Sam 25:39-42}

  • It is not right for a man that worships Alahayim to sleep with his wife before the marriage:

Joseph and Asenath 20:8

 And Joseph stayed that day with Pentephres; and he did not sleep with Aseneth, for he said, "It is not right for a man who worships Alahayim to have intercourse with his wife before their marriage."

How to find a Husband

  • Women, even as men, have to expend their labors on good works in the fruits, studying the gospel to perfect their walk, and their flocks (children/work) until Ahayah give them as a wife to a man that fears the Lord:

Sir 26:3  

A good wife is a good portion, which shall be given in the portion of them that fear the Lord.

  • So sisters should also focus on their growth in the faith with patience until Ahayah provides a husband according to his will lest they fall into wickedness and be given to a wicked man:

Sir 26:23  

wicked woman is given as a portion to a wicked man: but a holy woman is given to him that feareth the Lord.

  • Faith in Ahayah is important trusting his process and that he will provide a good man that fears him:

Sir 2:6  

Believe in him, and he will help thee; order thy way aright, and trust in him.

  • It is important to order your ways aright in the waiting process to keep his commandments and perform acceptable faithfulness because faith without works is dead:

Sir 15:15  

If thou wilt, to keep the commandments, and to perform acceptable faithfulness.

  • This faith and work is becoming of a woman that fears the Lord and you will just need to continue in patience for the help of a husband and turn not aside from the path of light in the commandments lest you fall:

Sir 2:7  

Ye that fear the Lord, wait for his mercy; and go not aside, lest ye fall.

Sir 2:8  

Ye that fear the Lord, believe him; and your reward shall not fail.

  • On this path, your reward shall not fail and the good you hoped for will come according to his will:

Sir 2:9  

Ye that fear the Lord, hope for good, and for everlasting joy and mercy. 
Sir 2:10  

Look at the generations of old, and see; did ever any trust in the Lord, and was confounded? or did any abide in his fear, and was forsaken? or whom did he ever despise, that called upon him?

  • Ruth choose to serve Ahayah Alahayim and was given unto Boaz, a righteous man, so the testimonies of the generations of old show none that trust in Ahayah are forsaken.

Attributes to identify if a man is fit for marriage:

Please sisters this is great wisdom to help you navigate through the current world when looking for a husband 

  • The scripture also give guidance for sisters on what types of men to beware of and avoid in their search for a relationship in the faith of Yache Christ:

2 Timothy 3:1 

This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.

2 Timothy 3:2 

For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

2 Timothy 3:3 

Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,

2 Timothy 3:4 

Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of Alahayim;

2 Timothy 3:5 

Having a form of holiness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.

2 Timothy 3:7 

Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth. 

2Ti 3:6  

For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts, 

  • If a man is detected walking in any of these attributes or spirits, he is denying the power and not in the knowledge of the truth so he is not fit for marriage in the faith of Yache Christ. This strange man, would only seduce silly women laden with sins led away with divers lusts: This means that the man may seem well put together, but it’s wise to pay attention to the workings of the man and how he walks and speaks. Is he an example of a believer or seeking to do so earnestly? For we know Pro 24:16  For a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again: but the wicked shall fall into mischief. So ladies keep an eye open and understand him to see if he does trip up does he keep getting worse adding sin upon sin [Sirach 3:27] or does he get back on his feet, learn and redirect his steps. [Pro 3:6] This is a key indicator and should be understood before walking into any relations, along with the proper steps of marriage.


  • You, daughters of Abraham in faith, are given wisdom through these scriptures to not be seduced by strange men being led away from the truth. By abiding in the fruits of the Spirit these will help you to identify for yourself what you need to see in others for a blessed bond. Please remember that prayer is needed and you should wait on word from Alahayim in patience until Ahayah give you to a man of understanding. From the testimony of Joseph & Asenath and Tobias & Sara, Alahayim shows a man and/or woman to whom they ought to be married. He speaks by dreams, visions, and prophets [1 Sam 28:6] so abiding in faith praying to the Most High about the man to direct your way in truth [Sir 37:15] and waiting on an answer from Him in necessary patience [Sir 20:32] concerning a potential spouse to ensure counsel is had before any action is taken [Sir 37:16] will ensure that your heart will not fear at any time because it was established by advised counsel from the Lord:


Sir 37:15  

And above all this pray to the most High, that he will direct thy way in truth.

Sir 37:16  

Let reason go before every enterprise, and counsel before every action.

Sir 20:32 

Necessary patience in seeking the Lord is better than he that leadeth his life without a guide.

Sir 22:16  

As timber girt and bound together in a building cannot be loosed with shaking: so the heart that is stablished by advised counsel shall fear at no time 

A Righteous way to go about Marriage

  • Step 1: Speak to the woman's father or brother/male figure of near kin (if father is deceased) about marrying her:

Tob 6:10  

The angel said to the young man, Brother, to day we shall lodge with Raguel, who is thy cousin; he also hath one only daughter, named Sara; I will speak for her, that she may be given thee for a wife.

Tob 7:9  

So he communicated the matter with Raguel: and Raguel said to Tobias, Eat and drink, and make merry:

Tob 7:10  

For it is meet that thou shouldest marry my daughter: nevertheless I will declare unto thee the truth.

Tob 7:11  

I have given my daughter in marriage to seven men, who died that night they came in unto her: nevertheless for the present be merry. But Tobias said, I will eat nothing here, till we agree and swear one to another.

Tob 7:12  

Raguel said, Then take her from henceforth according to the manner, for thou art her cousin, and she is thine, and the merciful Alahayim give you good success in all things.

  • Step 2: Receive her father's blessing

Tob 7:13  

Then he called his daughter Sara, and she came to her father, and he took her by the hand, and gave her to be wife to Tobias, saying, Behold, take her after the law of Moses, and lead her away to thy father. And he blessed them;

Polycarp to Philippians 5:2

…..It becometh men and women too, when they marry, to unite themselves with the consent of the bishop, that the marriage may be after the Lord and not after concupiscence. Let all things be done to the honour of Alahayim.

  • Step 3: Get the consent of the Bishop that the marriage may be after the Lord 

Polycarp to Philippians 5:2

…..It becometh men and women too, when they marry, to unite themselves with the consent of the bishop, that the marriage may be after the Lord and not after concupiscence. Let all things be done to the honour of Alahayim.

  • Step 4: write up a marriage covenant:

Tob 7:14  

And called Edna his wife, and took paper, and did write an instrument of covenants, and sealed it.

  • Step 5: have a feast

Tob 7:15-16  Then they began to eat.​ After Raguel called his wife Edna, and said unto her, Sister, prepare another chamber, and bring her in thither.

  • Step 6: prepare a room for the newly weds to consummate the marriage:

Tob 8:1  

And when they had supped, they brought Tobias in unto her.

Tob 8:4  

And after that they were both shut in together, Tobias rose out of the bed, and said, Sister, arise, and let us pray that Alahayim would have pity on us.

  • Step 7: Pray together for a blessing upon the marriage

Tob 8:5  

Then began Tobias to say, Blessed art thou, O Alahayim of our fathers, and blessed is thy holy and glorious name for ever; let the heavens bless thee, and all thy creatures.

Tob 8:6  

Thou madest Adam, and gavest him Eve his wife for an helper and stay: of them came mankind: thou hast said, It is not good that man should be alone; let us make unto him an aid like unto himself.

Tob 8:7  

And now, O Lord, I take not this my sister for lust but uprightly: therefore mercifully ordain that we may become aged together.

Tob 8:8  

And she said with him, Amen.

  • Step 8: Consummate the marriage

Tob 8:9  

So they slept both that night.

  • Enjoy the rest of the feast, however long it lasts

Tob 8:19  

And he kept the wedding feast fourteen days.

  • Step 9: take your wife with you to your homeland and get your parents blessing upon departure:

Tob 10:11  

And he blessed them, and sent them away, saying, The Alahayim of heaven give you a prosperous journey, my children.

Tob 10:12  

And he said to his daughter, Honour thy father and thy mother in law, which are now thy parents, that I may hear good report of thee. And he kissed her. Edna also said to Tobias, The Lord of heaven restore thee, my dear brother, and grant that I may see thy children of my daughter Sara before I die, that I may rejoice before the Lord: behold, I commit my daughter unto thee of special trust; where are do not entreat her evil. 

  • A wedding feast is a formality but isn't required by the law in marriage. A father's consent along with whatever dowry he may require and consummation is all that is required to make a marriage complete.



Unrighteous ways to go about Marriage

  • If a man falls into lust, he'll trespass against Alahayim and entice an unmarried woman and she'll consent to lay with him. 

Exo 22:16  

And if a man entice a maid that is not betrothed, and lie with her, he shall surely endow her to be his wife.
Exo 22:17  

If her father utterly refuse to give her unto him, he shall pay money according to the dowry of virgins.

  •  To rectify his trespass, he must endow her to be his wife and pay the dowry price, but it does not mean her father has to consent to give his daughter unto him as her father has a care for her body to give her unto a man of understanding if he wills. 

Sir 7:24  

Hast thou daughters? have a care of their body ........
Sir 7:25  

Marry thy daughter, and so shalt thou have performed a weighty matter: but give her to a man of understanding.

The Marriage life according to the Law & Testimonies

  • It is ordained from the beginning when a man takes a wife, his priorities change: 

Gen 2:24  

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.  

  • A woman's priorities change in marriage as well. Her desire is to her husband and he now has rule over her as oppose to her father:

Gen 3:16

Unto the woman he said,.....and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

  • Both a man and his wife's priorities change because the married seek how they may please their spouse:

1Co 7:32  

But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord:
1Co 7:33  

But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife.
1Co 7:34  

There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.

  • The law didn't say a man forsakes his parents because that would make him a blasphemer {Sir 3:16}

Sir 3:16  

He that forsaketh his father is as a blasphemer; and he that angereth his mother is cursed: of Alahayim.

  • With the examples of Jacob aiding his parents and while tending to his own household needs first, shows that the husband still honors his parents, including in-laws, who have also become his parents, {Tobit 10:12} but he simply tends to the needs of his household first.

Jubilees 29:15-16, 20

15. And he sent to his father Isaac of all his substance, clothing, and food, and meat, and drink, and milk, and butter, and cheese, and some dates of the valley, 16. And to his mother Rebecca also four times a year, between the times of the months, between ploughing and reaping, and between autumn and the rain (season) and between winter and spring, to the tower of Abraham. 20. And thither Jacob sent all that he did send to his father and his mother from time to time, all they needed, and they blessed Jacob with all their heart and with all their soul. 

  • A man leaves his parents, even as Jacob lived in his own house, and cleaves to his wife being the head of his own house to begin his own possession:

Sir 36:24  

He that getteth a wife beginneth a possession, a help like unto himself, and a pillar of rest.


  • His priorities have changed to focusing on cherishing and nurturing his wife as a guide and example of a believer:

Eph 5:25  

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
Eph 5:26  

That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
Eph 5:27  

That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
Eph 5:28  

So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
Eph 5:29  

For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

  •  For this reason, a man ought to spend a year with his new wife to foster a healthy relationship and cheer up his wife:

Deu 24:5  

When a man hath taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war, neither shall he be charged with any business: but he shall be free at home one year, and shall cheer up his wife which he hath taken.

Pro 5:18  

Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. 

Pro 5:19  

Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.

  • This is an important step in marriage that newly weds spend time nourishing their relationship and love for one another because the demon Asmodeus turns newly weds against each other:

Testament of Solomon 22-23

22. And I Solomon, on hearing this, bound him more carefully, and ordered him to be flogged with thongs of ox-hide, and to tell me humbly what was his name and what his business. And he answered me thus: "I am called Asmodeus among mortals, and my business is to plot against the newly wedded, so that they may not know one another.

  • So its this demon that hinders newly weds from taking the time to get to know one another:

And I sever them utterly by many calamities,

  • Then he causes hardships to befall them and they don't come together when times get tough, not having taken the time to build a solid relationship or walk in the fruits of the Spirit and faith in Yache with one another, so he accomplishes his goal of severing them utterly by the calamities he causes:

and I waste away the beauty of virgin women, and estrange their hearts."

  • This demon works on estranging women's hearts before they are even married so parents have to stand in the gap by prayer and having righteous discourse with their virgin daughters to strengthen them in the faith.

23.    And I said to him: "Is this thy only business?" And he answered me: "I transport men into fits of madness and desire, when they have wives of their own, so that they leave them, and go off by night and day to others that belong to other men; with the result that they commit sin, and fall into murderous deeds."

  • That demon also leads husbands into fits of sin against his wife. A husband and wife have to work hard at keeping unity in the faith because other spirits seek to attack them during the course of their marriage as well like the spirits of the cosmic darkness(Testament of Solomon 34, 38):

Testament of Solomon 89

89. The eighteenth said: "I am called Buldumêch. I separate wife from husband and bring about a grudge

between them: 

  • Hence couples have to be mindful of being bitter towards one another knowing it's this demon separating them.

Col 3:19  

Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

Hermas vision 1

3[7]:1 "But do thou, Hermas, no longer bear a grudge against thy children, neither suffer thy sister to have her way, so that they may be purified from their former sins. For they shall be chastised with a righteous chastisement, unless thou bear a grudge against them thyself. The bearing of a grudge worketh death. But thou, Hermas, hast had great tribulations of thine own, by reason of the transgressions of thy family, because thou hadst no care for them. For thou wast neglectful of them, and wast mixed up with thine evil transactions.

  • A man must not neglect his family being mixed up in evil business transactions or bearing a grudge against them: 

Hermas Parable 9

23[100]:4 If Alahayim and our Lord, Who ruleth over all things and hath the authority over all His creation, beareth no grudge against them that confess their sins, but is propitiated, doth man, who is mortal and full of sins, bear a grudge against man, as though he were able to destroy or save him?   23[100]:5 I say unto you--I, the angel of repentance--unto as many as hold this heresy, put it away from you and repent, and the Lord shall heal your former sins, if ye shall purify yourselves from this demon; but if not, ye shall be delivered unto him to be put to death.  

  • Bearing a grudge is a evil demon, so both husband and wife have to be mindful not to grieve the Holy Spirit by walking in the works of that demon or the works of the flesh that grieve her too: 

Eph 4:30  

And grieve not the holy Spirit of Alahayim, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption.
Eph 4:31  

Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

  • If husband and wife can guard themselves from these evil spirits in their marriage, they will prosper in their marriage and faith in Yache Christ. 

Eph 4:32  

And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as Alahayim for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.

  • These fruits of the Spirit will preserve a marriage from evil and this is the knowledge a husband ought to dwell with his wife in that their prayers be not hindered:

1Pe 3:7  

Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

  • The husband also has to be mindful of Jealousy to maintain sobriety, moderation and avoiding strife, lest the spirit of Jealousy rend him from his wife by these means:

Testament of Solomon 34, 38

34....And there came seven spirits , females, bound and woven together, fair in appearance and comely. And I Solomon, seeing them, questioned them and said: "Who are ye?" But they, with one accord, said with one voice: "We are of the thirty-six elements of the cosmic ruler of the darkness ." ......The fourth: "I am Jealousy."

38.    Likewise also the fourth said: "I cause men to forget their sobriety and moderation. I part them and split them into parties; for Strife follows me hand in hand. I rend the husband from the sharer of his bed, and children from parents, and brothers from sisters. But why tell so much to my despite? I have an angel that frustrates me, the great Balthial.

  • Knowing this spiritual warfare, a husband has to be on guard against jealousy and evil towards his wife:

Sir 9:1  

Be not jealous over the wife of thy bosom, and teach her not an evil lesson against thyself.

  • There is an element of Darkness that creates strifes and wrongs in men’s homes attacking the family and sends hard temper on the spouses:

Testament of Solomon 82

82. The eleventh said: "I am called Katanikotaêl. I create strife and wrongs in men's homes, and send on them hard temper. 

  • Understanding this, couples have to be on guard not to be hasty in temperament nor as lions to be hard tempered with their household:

Ecclesiastes 7:9 

Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.

Ecclesiasticus 4:30 

Be not as a lion in thy house, nor frantick among thy servants.

  • With understanding of this spirit and who it attacks, we can be wise in understanding not to give heed to this demon in the household, spouses must be on guard against anger to appease the strife that may come in the house:  


Pro 15:18  

A wrathful man stirreth up strife: but he that is slow to anger appeaseth strife.

  • If a man or woman does get frustrated, they ought to be still and keep silent in purity of heart and sit upon their bed to get back to tranquility and cheerfulness where the Holy Spirit dwells:

Psa 4:4  

Stand in awe, and sin not: commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still. Selah 

  • If a wrong was committed  against a spouse as the demon said he causes wrongs in the house, the servants of the Lord are admonished not to sin when angry. By taking heed to the instructions of psalms 4:4 and forgiving whomever from the heart and not being bitter about it before the day ends in order to not give place to the devil by forgiveness and bearing grudges amongst other spirits that may attach to you:

Eph 4:26-27  

Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil.

  • As men and women grow in the faith, they rule their own spirit to be slow to anger, operating in discretion with the spirits of  long suffering and understanding rather than getting frustrated or upset, but  remaining gentle, cheerful and tranquil:

Pro 16:32  

He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city 

Pro 19:11  

The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression 

Eph 4:31  

Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 

Eph 4:32  

And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as Alahayim for Christ's sake hath forgiven you 

Eph 4:30  

And grieve not the holy Spirit of Alahayim, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption 
Hermas mandate 5

1[33]:1 "Be thou long-suffering and understanding," he saith, "and thou shalt have the mastery over all evil deeds, and shalt work all righteousness.

1[33]:2 For if thou art long-suffering, the Holy Spirit that abideth in thee shall be pure, not being darkened by another evil spirit, but dwelling in a large room shall rejoice and be glad with the vessel in which she dwelleth, and shall serve Alahayim with much cheerfulness, having prosperity in herself.
1[33]:3 But if any angry temper approach, forthwith the Holy Spirit, being delicate, is straitened, not having [the] place clear, and seeketh to retire from the place; for she is being choked by the evil spirit, and has no room to minister unto the Lord, as she desireth, being polluted by angry temper. For the Lord dwelleth in long- suffering, but the devil in angry temper.

2[34]:3 But long-suffering is great and strong, and has a mighty and vigorous power, and is prosperous in great enlargement, gladsome, exultant, free from care, glorifying the Lord at every season, having no bitterness in itself, remaining always gentle and tranquil. This long-suffering therefore dwelleth with those whose faith is perfect.

2[34]:4 But angry temper is in the first place foolish, fickle and senseless; then from foolishness is engendered bitterness, and from bitterness wrath, and from wrath anger, and from anger spite; then spite being composed of all these evil elements becometh a great sin and incurable.

2[34]:5 For when all these spirits dwell in one vessel, where the Holy Spirit also dwelleth, that vessel cannot contain them, but overfloweth.

2[34]:6 The delicate spirit therefore, as not being accustomed to dwell with an evil spirit nor with harshness, departeth from a man of that kind, and seeketh to dwell with gentleness and tranquility.

2[34]:7 Then, when it hath removed from that man, in whom it dwells, that man becometh emptied of the righteous spirit, and henceforward, being filled with the evil spirits, he is unstable in all his actions, being dragged about hither and thither by the evil spirits, and is altogether blinded and bereft of his good intent. Thus then it happeneth to all persons of angry temper.

2[34]:8 Refrain therefore from angry temper, the most evil of evil spirits. But clothe thyself in long-suffering, and resist angry temper and bitterness, and thou shalt be round in company with the holiness which is beloved of the Lord.

Hermas Mandate 10

3[42]:1 "Therefore clothe thyself in cheerfulness, which hath favor with Alahayim always, and is acceptable to Him, and rejoice in it. For every cheerful man worketh good, and thinketh good, and despiseth sadness;

  • According to the law of Moses a man leads his wife away with him:

Tob 7:13

Then he called his daughter Sara, and she came to her father, and he took her by the hand, and gave her to be wife to Tobias, saying, Behold, take her after the Law of Moses, and lead her away to thy father: And he blessed them, 

  • (The taking of the hand to give her to her husband was to show the transfer of authority over his daughter. The woman being the man's bones and flesh, goes away from her parents with him. In the Testimonies, the patriarchs did the same.)

Jasher 45:6.

And Levi took Adinah, and Issachar took Aridah, and they came to the land of Canaan, to their father’s house, and Adinah bare unto Levi, Gershon, Kehath and Merari ; three sons.
Jasher 45:12.

And Asher went forth and took Adon the daughter of Aphlal, the son of Hadad, the son of Ishmael, for a wife, and he brought her to the land of Canaan.
Jasher 45:19.

And Zebulun went to Midian, and took for a wife Merishah the daughter of Molad, the son of
Abida, the son of Midian, and brought her to the land of Canaan

  • (even when one may have multiple wives, they still leave their father's house to be with their husband.)

Genesis 31:14-18

14  And Rachel and Leah answered and said unto him, Is there yet any portion or inheritance for us in our father's house?

15  Are we not counted of him strangers? for he hath sold us, and hath quite devoured also our money.

16  For all the riches which Alahayim hath taken from our father, that is ours, and our children's: now then, whatsoever Alahayim hath said unto thee, do.

17  Then Jacob rose up, and set his sons and his wives upon camels;

18  And he carried away all his cattle, and all his goods which he had gotten, the cattle of his getting, which he had gotten in Padanaram, for to go to Isaac his father in the land of Canaan.

Genesis 33:18

18  And Jacob came to Shalem, a city of Shechem, which is in the land of Canaan, when he came from Padan–aram; and pitched his tent before the city.

  • Through Jacob's testimony, a man moves to a new place with his wife in agreement with them to go.   According to the scriptures, we have testimonies to see that the woman also has her desire unto her husband forgetting her father's house, so both husband and wife have to leave their parents and cleave together. 

Psalm 45:10-11

10  Hearken, O daughter, and consider, and incline thine ear; forget also thine own people, and thy father's house;

11  So shall the king greatly desire thy beauty: for he is thy Lord; and worship thou him.

Understanding due Benevolence

  • Concerning extra marital pleasures between an husband and wife, i.e "foreplay" the teaching is: "marriage is honorable in all and the bed undefiled;"[Heb 13:4] therefore a husband may lawfully be ravished in the love of his wife [Prob 5:17-18] with consensual and due benevolence seeing as though they belong to each other. [I Cor 7:3-5] So it is not unlawful  for a husband and his wife to enjoy each other in the privacy of their bed.

Heb 13:4  

Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers Alahayim will judge.

  • It is righteous for spouses to be passionate for one another:

Pro 5:18  

Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. 

Pro 5:19  

Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love. 

 1Co 7:3  

Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. 
1Co 7:4  

The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. 
1Co 7:5  

Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. 

  • It is not upright to defraud one another of due benevolence except with consent, lest Satan tempt you for your incontinency to go commit fornication: 

1Co 7:2  

Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.

  • The Union of a husband and his wife is beautiful in the sight of Alahayim because He is united in agreement with his family and made man to be in his image. Wisdom, Ahayah’s wife, the Mother of all creation, counts husband and wife as a thing that beautifies her:

Sir 25:1

In three things I was beautified, and stood up beautiful, both before Alahayim and men: the unity of brethren, the love of neighbors, a man and a wife that agree together.
Sir 25:7

There be nine things which I have judged in mine heart to be happy, and the tenth I will utter with my tongue: a man that hath joy of his children, and he that liveth to see the fall of his enemy.
Sir 25:8

Well is him that dwelleth with a wife of understanding, and that hath not slipped with his tongue, and that hath not served a man more unworthy then himself.
Sir 40:23

A friend and companion never meet amiss: but above both is a wife with her husband.

  • Please Continue to the Lawful Marriages tab to complete the edification.

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